It’s pretty obvious that human beings are getting dumber by the day, each generation is worse than the one before it and people aren’t trying to stop this decline at all.Teachers are on the frontlines of this battle, they’re witnessing this phenomenon first hand and they’re struggling with it immensely, and the worst part is that the system doesn’t even allow them to deal with it properly because if they do they will end up hurting the student’s feelings and the helicopter parents will be outraged by it.
Not a teacher, but in my senior year of high school I was in a personal finance class. The teacher explained that not paying your taxes could get you incarcerated. Student: “So if you don’t pay your taxes, the government will light you on fire?!” Teacher: “No, incarcerated means to imprison. You’re thinking of incinerated.” Student: “Oh. Wait, then what’s taxidermy?”
Not a teacher but:”What happens if a girl pees during sex? Does it push the guy out like a geyser??”.From a 17 year old girl who was doing well in biology. Was.We had a solid argument for 15 minutes on how many holes a girl has.
Sex Ed Class: Is Breast milk 1% or 2%?
Not a question, but more of a statement that prompted a whole discussion when I was student teaching.(To set the stage, I would like to point out that I am white and my leading teacher was African American, and the classroom was about 60% African American, 30% Latino, and the remaining 10% a mixture of Asian and white. This was also my advanced class and we were discussing the apartheid in Africa.)Me: So the Black Africans and White Africans -Student raises hand: Miss Duckie, you can’t say thatMe: Say what?Student: Black. Its AFRICAN AMERICANMe, trying my hardest to not die a little inside: No, that is actually not the correct phrase. Can anyone tell me why ‘African American’ is not the correct term for this situation?SilenceMe: Okay guys, look at it this way, are we talking about Americans? No. We are not. We are talking about a racial issue in AFRICA with no relation to AMERICA at all. The definition of AFRICAN AMERICAN is a person of AFRICAN descent living in AMERICA. So if the people we are talking about are not American, they cannot be African American can they? So to talk about the racial issue, the labels used are Black Africans and White Africans (as outlined by our textbook).Student: No. You can’t say that. They are African American.At this point my lead teacher is face palming. She is in total disbelief, and as much as she loved to watch me struggle, she stepped in and tried to explain it as well. Twenty minutes go by of the two of us trying our best. The bell rings. The kids still couldn’t figure it out. I think we both nearly cried.
We were looking at the Japanese flag and a kid asked “Is that why they wear that dot on their forehead?”
Wasn’t a teacher, a lifeguard on a beach.Man with a very thick Chicago accent asked me where the switch was to turn off the waves, so he could let his daughter go out and play in the water.So I told him it was at my boss’ stand.
“How old was the average 18 year old in 1942?”He then managed to forget he was wearing his own glasses and asked everybody where they were
Not a teacher but a classmate of mine asked if asia was a town in china, and, assuming that she was right, said that it was crazy that so many people from our school came from one town
Grade 5 Sex Ed. I hade a rule that any question can be asked but I might ask you to ask your parents instead of me.”I heard a story about a man who put his ‘stuff’ into muffins and fed it to grade 1 kids.””Well… that is pretty digusting and I would think that person would go to jail for doing that””Wouldn’t the girls get pregnant from eating it?”And before I could say anything another student blurted out “NO!! They wouldn’t get pregnant!! They haven’t gone through puberty yet!!”I am thankful for days when kids remind me that they are still kids 🙂
Taught English/Literature in a Juvenile Justice long term treatment facility. I have many great stories.Me: This is a map of the United States. Here is the midwest–it’s where your math teacher is from. Student: Oh snap. We’re in a war with them. Me: Are you thinking about the middle east? Student: Oh yeah, is that a different place?Me: (Playing a trivia game with students) Johannes Gutenberg invented what? Student: (Shoots his hand up in the air quickly before I even finished the question and very sure of his answer) Cheese!Student: (Reading the three little pigs out loud)And the big bad wolf huffed and he puffed…and he passed it around Me: I’ve never heard of that version of the story before Mr. Student Student: You wouldn’t, Mr. Ellipsis_, it’s the hood version.
My wife is the teacher, but this is my favorite story of hers. They were discussing how native americans relied on hunting buffalo and used all parts of it for food, clothing, shelter, etc. In reference to how they used the buffalo for shelter, one student asked “So do they stack the buffalo on top of each other?”
Had a student ask me “What are those pyramid-shaped things in egypt called?”Never seen a class laugh that hard before.
Warm spring day.No A/C.Fan blowing in the front of the room.Hand goes up.”Can you make the fan ovulate?”No. No, I can’t.
I’m a corporate trainer, so hopefully this counts.I used to train content for an exam that everyone in our field must take to get licensed. If you didn’t pass, you had to go back through the course. Well, I had a dude go through my class 4 times. FOUR.Here’s the conversation we had before his 3rd exam:Guy: “What attempt am I on?”Me: “Wait.. what?”Guy: “Well, I’ve taken the test twice, but everyone else in here hasn’t taken it, so am I taking my test for the first time or the third time?”Me: “What do you think?”Guy: “I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking you.”Dude thought that he might be on his first attempt because he was back in a class with a bunch of people who were on theirs.
How old do you have to be to smoke crack? ~ a fellow student at Waukegan circa 1988.
Some teachers have the philosophy that “there is no such thing as a stupid question’, but in all honesty, some people do ask some really questionable questions! I’m so glad I’ve never had an awkward student/teacher interaction, but the same can’t be said for these awkward students.